Facets Away

Lower back pain, it's a true pain in the ass (well, close enough) that's for sure. At some point in the evolutionary chain, we went from walking on all fours to scuffling along on two feet, and that's when all our problems started. I sometimes wonder if Cro Magnon  man or Mr. Neanderthal, after a tough day of hunting and gathering, sat down on a bed of fur wondering what to do about the nagging pain in their lower spine.
My own back pain started after the birth of my daughter almost sixteen years ago.  I'm convinced that while the little darling was growing inside me, she managed to knock my pelvis out of whack, which has led to years and years of searching for ways to make the pain stop.
You name the treatment, and I've probably tried it; chiropractic, physical therapy, decompression therapy, deep tissue massage, and a bizarre hands-on manipulation where the practitioner pressed down on my pelvic region and told me to think about urinating.
Yoga and pilates classes, yep, tried those as well.

Relief from all of the above would be short and sweet. Nothing seemed to provide a permanent solution and apparently the two arthritic discs in my lower left back weren't bad enough to require surgery.
I tried to keep a smile on my face and stay positive despite the pain.

But now I think I've found the doctor who can make me pain free again.
Today he performed a little something called a lumbar rhizotomy. In a nutshell, he cauterized the facet nerves that were generating all of the agony from my degenerating discs. If all goes as planned, the treatment should last anywhere from nine months to two years.

"In some cases the pain never returns, " said the doctor, a man who has the potential of topping my all time favorite human being list.
Two to three weeks from now, I'll learn if this rhizotomy thing was successful. Tonight, I'll get comfy on the couch with an ice pack on my back.